Stoke City Council has dropped plans to make drug dealers sell drugs in plain packaging prompting allegations it had given in to lobbying by local drug lords.
"This is tish and fipsy," says council drugs czar Mackenzie Blazes. "We are simply waiting to see what happens with similar trials in Amsterdam and Bangkok before deciding how we should proceed."
"Think of the children," says family campaigner Mary Stump. "THE CHILDREN!"
Mr Blazes welcomed his own decision on the matter. "I welcome myself and the decision I reached, it is both sensible and magnificent in equal measure."
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