Threat To Military Tradition

Stokies are up in outrage after military cutbacks means one of the city's oldest military traditions may have to be scrapped.

"This is an insult to our brave boys," armed combat fan Terry Duck said. "I've sold my house and given all the money to Help For Heroes to show my support for them. The charity part of the organisation that is, not Help For Heroes Trading Limited, the limited company part not run as a charity but as a going business concern where they can be more liberal with their spending on peoples wages and expenses."

"This is the least we can do for our brave boys, let them spend months of time, at tax payers expense, practising marching up and down or something for our entertainment. It's a disgrace that this kind of thing might be axed, a fucking disgrace," pensioner Doreen Layton commented.

"I don't care about the bullying or raping of female soldiers that the top brass refuse to acknowledge or investigate, all I know is our brave boys put their lives on the line for us everyday, and for them to be told they can't do one of their things anymore is a step too far," Fred Worst added.

The 'Trooping Of The Coloureds' has been carried out in Stoke for centuries, and involves white soldiers blacking up as colonial commoners and performing ethnic dances in front of the public, before some of our brave boys come and beat them in a dance off with more elegant western dances, thus sentencing the blacks to be killed in mock executions performed in styles suggested by members of the crowd. It's a treat for all the family.