Port Vale director Hobble Kenton has urged fans attending night games to LIGHT UP cigarettes to help LIGHT UP the stadium!
"To help our money saving measures, we are considering turning down the brightness of our floodlights by 10%," explained Mr Kenton. "If Scamps fans can do something that would add light inside the ground to compensate for this, like smoking cigarettes - legal ones only of course! - then this would be a big help."
Vale's next night game is against cockney scumbags Leyton Orient on 11 March. The club will be selling cigarettes in the stands at a discounted price and showing pictures of glamorous celebrities smoking to encourage fans.
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