People all over Stoke have begun to realise lifelong dreams by being able to shout abuse at public officials, knowing they can do so consequence free!
The move comes in the wake of "plebgate", where Tory cabinet minister Andrew Mitchell has been told he will face no enquiry after verbally abusing a Downing Street policeman.
"I've been waiting for this moment to come for years," says Hanley resident Ted Fisting, 67, who has never voted in any form of election, other than voting for fit birds on 'Strictly Come Dancing'. "I’m targeting local MPs to give 'em a taste of their own medicine, and also to give the dirty bastards a taste of my own medicine, which has a rather bitter taste."
"I feel like Christmas has come early," adds burglar Ted Hindenberg. "I'll be giving it some to the rozzers and the MPs, the dirty bastards."
"I think we should show the same level of respect to our elected officials that they show to us," says Ted Pob, a daredevil and parish councillor in Packmoor. "Which is none, so I'm all for it! If any of those wonky-eyed, left-titted, bald-bollocked donkey munchers we call our local MPs ever come to Packmoor, I will quite literally give them a fucking mouthful, the dirty bastards."
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