Stoke City 1-1 Manchester City
Wealthy and influential people from countries that abuse human rights hold no interest for Peter Crouch, so he scored to ensure that Man City's owners returned home with faces like smacked arses, and hopefully to realise the error of their ways and give the women there equal rights and stuff. Man City fans aren't bothered by people abusing human rights so long as they spend shit tons of money on their team.
Plymouth 1-3 Port Vale
The Scamps have now gone a club record four games without losing. Robbie Williams gave Plymouth the lead in this game, not realising that Scamps manager Micky Adams is at his best when he has to think about what he is doing, and as soon as he realised that Plymouth were rubbish, he told his players this and told them to go out and win, which they did, with hilarious consequences.
Real Fegg Hayes 7-7 Athletico Kidsgrove
The Royals came from 0-7 down in injury time to grab a draw against their local rivals from Kidsgrove to grab an undeserved draw in front of 75,142 fans. Manager Keith Gobbler missed the game after his mistress went into labour in the club's chapel before the game. He is hoping for a son called Rodney.
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