Stoke is a confederated city, meaning that it is made up of a large number of smaller towns. Originally, there were the "seven towns" of Burslem, Fegg Hayes, Fenton, Hanley, Longton, Stoke-upon-Trent and Tunstall. Now, however, there is a whole load more of them! Here is a summary of some of those towns!
Burslem
*Burslem is located in the north west of the city.
*The name comes from the German verb 'boslen', which means 'to sweat'.
*Burslem was originally called Boslem, and still is by some locals.
*Burslem is the largest town in Stoke, but not the best.
*Burslem is the home town of 15 time darts world champion "Fingers" Phil Taylor.
*Burslem is a paragon of multiculturalism, with a considerable Asian population living side-by-side with BNP supporters.
*Burslem's School of Art is renowned throughout Britain.
*Vauxhall Conference association football team Port Vale are based in Burslem. Founded in 1876 as "Boslem Scamps FC", the team changed its name in 1974 during Stoke's bid for independence from the UK. They are still nicknamed "The Scamps" to this day.
*Burslem is home to Lake Burslem, world famous for its resident monster called "Bursie".
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Cobridge
*Cobridge is located just above Stoke city centre (Hanley).
*The name Cobridge comes from 'cob ridge', a ridge in the town where corn-on-the-cob was first grown!
*The "Cobridge lights" is a formation of red lights that can be seen in Cobridge at night. No-one knows what causes them to appear.
*The potato fritter was invented in Cobridge in 1841.
*50% of women from Cobridge have a tattoo on at least one of their ankles.
*During WW2, Hitler ordered that Cobridge should not be bombed.
*Cobridge has the highest concentration of massage parlours-to-people of anywhere in the British Isles!
*The Cobridge Opera Company (COC) is one of the best known in the area, and is about to launch its new show, 'Phil Taylor: The Opera'!
*The world's first 5-wheel car was built in Cobridge in 1947.
*People from Cobridge must live life to the fullest! That's probably why they have the shortest life expectancy of people from anywhere in Staffordshire.
*British Prime Minister David Cameron has yet to visit Cobridge. Coward.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
*50% of women from Cobridge have a tattoo on at least one of their ankles.
*During WW2, Hitler ordered that Cobridge should not be bombed.
*Cobridge has the highest concentration of massage parlours-to-people of anywhere in the British Isles!
*The Cobridge Opera Company (COC) is one of the best known in the area, and is about to launch its new show, 'Phil Taylor: The Opera'!
*The world's first 5-wheel car was built in Cobridge in 1947.
*People from Cobridge must live life to the fullest! That's probably why they have the shortest life expectancy of people from anywhere in Staffordshire.
*British Prime Minister David Cameron has yet to visit Cobridge. Coward.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Dresden
*Dresden is located in the south of Stoke, just below Longton.
*Dresden comes from the Chinese ‘dres tun’, meaning 'cock slap'.
*Dresden in Stoke should not be confused with Dresden in Germany! They are completely different places!
*Dresden is home to Dresden University of Technology, Dresden University of Fine Science, Dresden Academy of Fine Arts, Dresden International University as well as many other research institutes.
*It is one of the greenest urban areas in Europe, with 63% of Dresden being green areas and forests. There are also four nature reserves and special conservation areas.
*Dresden has played host to several international political summits, including the Petersburg Dialogue, a meeting held annually between Russian and German leaders.
*Historically, Dresden had been a cultural centre, filled with museums, historic buildings and art galleries and was a leading centre of classical music.
*Dresden’s golden period was between 1697 and 1763, when two of its residents also served as kings of Poland. The last monarch of Dresden abdicated in 1918.
*Dresden was home to French emperor Napoleon during the Napoleonic Wars.
*Dresden was devastated by an Allied bombing raid during WW2 that destroyed much of the town. Many people consider the bombing as a war crime due to the unnecessary death and destruction caused. Between 35,000 and 145,000 people were killed by the Allied bombing. A post-WW2 USAF report on the bombing justified Dresden as a legitimate military and industrial target. The bombing is celebrated each year on 13 February.
*Russian president Vladimir Putin was stationed in Dresden by the KGB between 1985 and 1990.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Etruria
*Etruria is located in the centre of Stoke, west of Hanley.
*No-one knows where the name Etruria come from, or has ever tried to find out.
*No-one knows where the name Etruria come from, or has ever tried to find out.
*During the Middle Ages, deposits of slag, sequins and non-precious gems were discovered in Etruria.
*The 1986 National Back Yard Festival was held in the area now known as Festival Park (or “Fezzie Park” as locals call it). Previously wasteland and closed down mines, the area was regenerated because of the festival and now has a Toys 'R' Us, McDonald's and a Quasar.
*The Stoke area's first "skyscraper", a three-story opium den, was built in Etruria in 1806.
*Joan Baez recorded her debut album at a folk club in Etruria in 1959.
*In Etruria, it is against the law to be drunk and in possession of a badger.
*Etruria is home to 22% of all restaurants in Stoke, including menus from 50 different countries. Future North Vietnamese revolutionary leader Ho Chi Minh worked as a chef in a Vietnamese restaurant in Etruria in 1919 where he developed his interest in communism.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
*Joan Baez recorded her debut album at a folk club in Etruria in 1959.
*In Etruria, it is against the law to be drunk and in possession of a badger.
*Etruria is home to 22% of all restaurants in Stoke, including menus from 50 different countries. Future North Vietnamese revolutionary leader Ho Chi Minh worked as a chef in a Vietnamese restaurant in Etruria in 1919 where he developed his interest in communism.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Fegg Hayes
*Fegg Hayes is located in the north of Stoke, next to the Knypersley mountain range.
*The name Fegg Hayes comes from the greek 'Fides Hades', meaning 'Faith in Hades'. Hades is the Greek god of the underworld.
*Fegg Hayes is the home of the world famous Fegg Hayes Yeti.
*The name Fegg Hayes comes from the greek 'Fides Hades', meaning 'Faith in Hades'. Hades is the Greek god of the underworld.
*Fegg Hayes is the home of the world famous Fegg Hayes Yeti.
*Fegg Hayes looks different from much of Stoke because of its unique history. From 1386 to 1797, Fegg Hayes was ruled by Viennese nobility. As such, much of Fegg Hayes reflects the era when it was part of the Republic of Vienna, its streets full of romanesque and baroque architecture.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Fenton
*Fenton is located just south of the city centre (Hanley and Stoke-upon-Trent).
*Fenton, from the Chinese 'feng tun', means 'bitch slap'.
*Fenton has been called "the place Longton wishes it was".
*During WWI, Fenton declared itself a tax haven hoping to attract rich war-evaders.
*Fenton is home to Fenton Magistrates Court. Local judges are notoriously strict, often handing out sentences such as "hard labour", chain gangs and 100+ year prison terms.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Goldenhill
*Goldenhill is located in northern Stoke, between Tunstall and Kidsgrove.
*Goldenhill took its name from the big hill in the centre of town, which people used to stand on top of and have a piss. It was seen as a sign of good luck if you could rotate yourself around 360 degrees whilst doing one long unbroken circle of piss around you.
*People from Goldenhill are known as "hill folk".
*Goldenhill's official motto is "Canis est Agricola", which means "the dog is a farmer".
*The average person in Goldenhill eats four crispy pancakes per week.
*Pimping is legal in Goldenhill as long as you are pimping people you are related to.
*Spaceships are outlawed in Goldenhill and aliens are to be killed on sight.
*It is traditional in Goldenhill to smear gravy on your face before eating your Sunday lunch.
*The phrase "Chinny reckon" was invented by Goldenhill native Barry Gobblesworth.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Goms Mill
*Goms Mill is located in South Central Stoke, just below Longton.
*Originally called "Gummers Mill", the town took its name from a toothless prostitute who plied her trade next to the local castle.
*Goms Mill is home to Britain's biggest horse meat factory.
*Famous people from Goms Mill include serial killer Mick Hammer and rocker Lenny Kravitz.
*There are more people called Terry per square foot of Goms Mill than in any other part of Stoke.
*Due to an ancient local law, the town is policed not by Staffordshire Police but by the Goms Mill Republican Army, an independent militia governed by God.
*Due to an ancient local law, the town is policed not by Staffordshire Police but by the Goms Mill Republican Army, an independent militia governed by God.
*The official drink of Goms Mill is special brew.
*The official food of Goms Mill is kebab.
*The biggest selling single ever in Goms Mill is Michael Bolton's definitive (cover) version of 'If You Don’t Know Me By Now'.
*The official food of Goms Mill is kebab.
*The biggest selling single ever in Goms Mill is Michael Bolton's definitive (cover) version of 'If You Don’t Know Me By Now'.
*It is still legal in Goms Mill for men to beat their "wenches".
*Goms Mill waterfall, the scene of Stoke's biggest people massacre this century, is among the biggest in the city, though not one of the best.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
*Hanley is located bang in the middle of Stoke and is perhaps better known as Stoke's city centre.
*Hanley comes from the latin 'han lay', which means 'hen party'.
*Hanley comes from the latin 'han lay', which means 'hen party'.
*Coal mining was important in Hanley until Margaret Thatcher closed down all the mines in the 1980s, calling them an "eyesore" on the beautiful Stoke landscape.
*Hanley is home to Stoke's biggest building, the Potteries Shopping Centre. It contains many of this Britain's biggest high street names including Sock Shop and Tie Rack!
*Hanley is also home to one of Stoke's biggest cathedrals, Hanley Cathedral, which is built on the site of an ancient stargate. It is currently being refurbished after being partly destroyed by a fire caused by a faulty lava lamp.
*Hanley has different districts, known as quarters. There is the commercial quarter, the cultural quarter, the French quarter, the red light quarter and the thieves' quarter.*Central Forest Park (aka: Needle Park) is located in Hanley. That's where you're most likely to find Bigfoot in Stoke! Or a drug dealer.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Longton
*Longton is located in the south of Stoke.
*The name Longton comes from the Chinese 'long tun', meaning 'arse slap'.
*Longton is affectionately referred to as the "arse end of Stoke".
*Longton is home to a wide range of shops such as Tesco Extra, Sainsbury’s and Lidl.
*Portugal is Longton's oldest ally. The Longton-Portugal Treaty signed in 1373 is still in force.
*Vicious gang warfare between gangs from South Longton (southside) and North Longton (westside) have raged on the mean streets of Longton for years.
*Portugal is Longton's oldest ally. The Longton-Portugal Treaty signed in 1373 is still in force.
*Vicious gang warfare between gangs from South Longton (southside) and North Longton (westside) have raged on the mean streets of Longton for years.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Norton
*Norton is located in the north of the city.
*The name Norton comes from the Chinese 'nob tun', meaning 'cock slap'.
*Norton tries to convince people it's fancy by calling itself Norton-Le-Moors sometimes, but we all know the truth.
*People from Norton are known as "Dem Nortoners".
*Badgers are sacred to Dem Nortoners and must not be consumed or milked in their presence.
*Norton has the highest number of fight clubs of any of Stoke's towns.
*The ancient art of "seagulling" is celebrated every 14 July in Norton with a parade and free-for-all.
*If you meet a woman from Norton, she is probably a slag.
*Famous multinational businesses with outlets in Norton include McDonald's, Coca Cola, Harrod's and Cal's Crazy Paving.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area
Stoke-upon-Trent
Norton
*Norton is located in the north of the city.
*The name Norton comes from the Chinese 'nob tun', meaning 'cock slap'.
*Norton tries to convince people it's fancy by calling itself Norton-Le-Moors sometimes, but we all know the truth.
*People from Norton are known as "Dem Nortoners".
*Badgers are sacred to Dem Nortoners and must not be consumed or milked in their presence.
*Norton has the highest number of fight clubs of any of Stoke's towns.
*The ancient art of "seagulling" is celebrated every 14 July in Norton with a parade and free-for-all.
*If you meet a woman from Norton, she is probably a slag.
*Famous multinational businesses with outlets in Norton include McDonald's, Coca Cola, Harrod's and Cal's Crazy Paving.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area
Stoke-upon-Trent
*Stoke-upon Trent is located in the centre of Stoke-on-Trent! Confused? You will be!
*Stoke derives from the Latin word 'stoc', meaning 'barn fight'.
*Many locals want the town renamed to avoid confusion between Stoke-upon-Trent and Stoke-on-Trent. "Old Stoke", "Ye Olde Stoc" and "Barn Fight-upon-Trent" are popular choices for new names amongst residents.
*Stoke-upon-Trent is home to the Council of Elders, Stoke City Council and Staffordshire University.
*Stoke-upon-Trent was officially at war with Russia for 110 years. At the outbreak of the Crimean War, Britain declared war on Russia in the name of Britain, Ireland, Stoke-upon-Trent and all British Dominions. But when the war ended in 1856, the Paris Peace Treaty omitted Stoke. So Stoke was technically at war with Russia until 1966 when a Soviet official, made aware of the situation, visited the town to declare peace!
*Stoke derives from the Latin word 'stoc', meaning 'barn fight'.
*Many locals want the town renamed to avoid confusion between Stoke-upon-Trent and Stoke-on-Trent. "Old Stoke", "Ye Olde Stoc" and "Barn Fight-upon-Trent" are popular choices for new names amongst residents.
*Stoke-upon-Trent is home to the Council of Elders, Stoke City Council and Staffordshire University.
*Stoke-upon-Trent was officially at war with Russia for 110 years. At the outbreak of the Crimean War, Britain declared war on Russia in the name of Britain, Ireland, Stoke-upon-Trent and all British Dominions. But when the war ended in 1856, the Paris Peace Treaty omitted Stoke. So Stoke was technically at war with Russia until 1966 when a Soviet official, made aware of the situation, visited the town to declare peace!
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Trentham
*Trentham is located in the south-west of Stoke.
*The name Trentham comes from the French saying 'tres temme', which means 'very effeminate' or 'very camp'.
*Trentham is home to Trentham Park, Trentham Gardens (which are basically two halves of the same thing) and best of all, Trentham Monkey Forest!
Trentham
*Trentham is located in the south-west of Stoke.
*The name Trentham comes from the French saying 'tres temme', which means 'very effeminate' or 'very camp'.
*Trentham is home to Trentham Park, Trentham Gardens (which are basically two halves of the same thing) and best of all, Trentham Monkey Forest!
*Trentham was one of the “Rotten Boroughs” eliminated as parliamentary constituencies by the Reform Act of 1832.
*Horror movie 'The Evil Dead' was filmed on location in Trentham.
*Trentham has two different golf courses. They're just taking the piss, no town needs that many.
*People from Trentham think they’re so much better than everyone else, but they're not. They're dirty dogs like the rest of us.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
Tunstall
*Tunstall is located in Stoke's north-west, above Burslem.
*Tunstall comes from the Chinese 'tun sall', meaning 'slap my thigh'.
*Tunstall is home to Stoke's Chinatown area. The first Chinese settlers arrived here in 1065.
*Tunstall comes from the Chinese 'tun sall', meaning 'slap my thigh'.
*Tunstall is home to Stoke's Chinatown area. The first Chinese settlers arrived here in 1065.
*Historians have discovered that locals were using iron ore found in the area to manufacture weapons from as early as the 13th century.
*Britain's first holiday camp was Tunstall's Fascist Family Camp which opened in 1905. Alcohol was strictly banned (though opiates were allowed) and any holiday maker caught talking after 10pm was spanked.
*Britain's first holiday camp was Tunstall's Fascist Family Camp which opened in 1905. Alcohol was strictly banned (though opiates were allowed) and any holiday maker caught talking after 10pm was spanked.
*Pop star Robbie Williams grew up in the area.
