With the change of season came a change of language in Stoke as French was chosen as the city's official new language when English was bought out by French energy company Dalkia.
The move to the new language and culture was a smooth one as most Stokies were already fluent in the latin tongue and enjoy croissants and cigarettes.
Elsewhere, the Russian state circus came to the city, coinciding with an increase in pick-pocketing, child-abduction and bear-maulings. These happenings are thought to be unrelated.
September also saw further kidnappings by pirates operating on Lake Burslem, when an elderly couple from nearby Leek were taken. The government of the Staffordshire Moorlands market town refused to negotiate with the pirates leading to the ruthless execution of the couple, broadcast live on the internet.
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