Saturday 8 November 2014

Staffordshire Police To Take Christmas Break

Staffordshire Police spokesman PC Barry Shanks has confirmed that the force will be closing down over Christmas.

"Because of government cutbacks, and staff wanting time off over Chrimbo, we have decided to close for a couple of weeks from 22 December until 04 January 2015," PC Shanks explained. "Before and after that we will be offering an almost full service. An awesome service, some might say. But for this time period, we won't really be doing anything."


PC Shanks has played down fears that the lack of police will lead to an explosion of crime in the city.

"The facts are that most crims are too lazy to do anything over Christmas," PC Shanks said. "Having bobbies on the beat is kind of pointless. And some of the work local vigilantes have been doing recently is outstanding, real top stuff. You'll be alright, don't worry. These things have a way of working themselves out."

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